the lovely bones

This movie is wonderfull and lovely. The moment i watch it. I feel so into it. Why? Because the art really beautifull, and the first person narrator. Haha. I guess beside fast pace action modern movie were my fav, the other would be beautifull movie. Haha.

anyway, this story is about young girl, sadly this young girl been murder. Is not a sad story, but this young girl live in between heaven and earth, she unable to let go of her family, and her family are also unable. I love this movie because it remind me movie could be wonderful as in novel. Even i close my eye. I can see to movie. And in my mind, i feel that i'm reading a novel, expect the art would be different than i imagine. Haha.

well. Well solid 5 star for those that love wonderfull thing.

Again. Wake up feeling nothing. I hate being heartless. Is just so hard to go throught the day, sitting on sofa, watching tv. Well. Try to get up and get some emotion today.

so i was thinking. Why like being all emotion. i just like to know how it be like, the no joyfull or delightfull feeling around, even none was love. So then feeling i can get is sorrow and sober. Living alone wit no one to talk, i mean a girl, just sad. I unable to pour it out. I have no idea how.

right now, i'm watch grey anatomy, is 1 of my fav tv series, just because everytime i watch, my tear usually get out. I can do that all day. Haha.

i know i'm pathetic. Is just even i got friends around, i just, or i think learn my lesson. Never tell your feeling to anyone at anytime. All the time i feel that i too attach to some1, i need to be so attach, i don't have right now, and i don't bether too try because it is bad. Learn my lesson even it will make it my life misreable cos not trying it. But this blog had no emotion. It wont dump me. Haha.

dream

watching glee just now, they that about dream. Yes. 1 thing that strike me is dream is something that will fill our heart and us feel happy. Well. I know what really can make me happy and dream come true. But i know it will take forever. That why is at bottom of my wishlist.

actually. There no spark in my life. I'm glad that people really care about ourself. But today. Nothing let me down. Is just that i feel really sad for no reason. Perhaps i really want attention. Perhaps i really wan some1 talk about me. There are only dream i guess. No one really love me to say everyday in front her eye is always me.

world are cruel.

This pass few days or weeks, i feel pretty good about myself. I feel more confident and more brave. Why? Because i got something special going on.

yesterday was special. I was finally prove myself that i'm not really lose to confident to talk or ask people out. I manage to ask some1 out. Wat a relive that it is achievement, and guess what. It happen in labuan. Hehe. Yeah!

Sitting inside ferry, with calm sea, is much better that yesterday, when i went back to lbn, is not a joy ride, my head moving back and ford, right and left, but i'm ok wit it, glad to reach the island soil, stable. Right now i'm heading to kk, in 15 min i will arrive. Hehe back here again, to my own home.

3 hour ride to kk is very long to some people. Is almost same time if using car to memunbuk. But cost of maintanace to car is unnotice, my old car can't take that much. Express ferry ride drawback is seasick. Huhu. I'm ok wit it. Never have problem.

today, i meet some1. Is been a while i never go out at lbn alone wit some1 that i'm not familiar. Well. I just hope that i break my coward inside me about this island. Thanks to her. Ok then.

Haha. Today such a good day. Being able go to work, yes, i found there more pleasurable than my home and outside work. Got pc, updating facebook, doing something we love which is designing, having pressure of work, eat kfc, order laptop, yeah, and got sunshine shine.

haha. 1 thing i really like, i really able to speak english again. Seriously, is been a while, need to get confident back.

did i tell you all that got 2 new person on my office and 2 trainey.

Last weekend, my family came to kk. I'm was so happy. Yeah! So happy cos got some1 chean my house, dinner and watch movie.

so last weekend i watched prince of persia and sherk 3d. Prince of persia is awesome movie, it remind me of assassin creed, since that game only i play about mid east.

sherk 3d? The reason i wanted to watch this is to watch 3d. How was 3d? Is was fun. Really real 3d. I sure wanted to watch avatar 3d

Waking up wit a sad dream. Dream that about some1 that i should forgetten. Why still inside me. Even the face, the smell, the touch is long forgetten, but the present of her still can be fell inside the dream. Is a sad dream because i know i speak less, the time i speak less is the time is about the end. Everything is negative.

well. I prefer sad feeling rather emotionless, at least i can feel love is pain. So today, a holiday, will be a sober day for me. Plan is watch tv. And cook nice food. Just to heal my soul.

Work. A part of it being interesting, everyday i try solve some puzzle or calculate something, well, most of time fb, to just loose the pressure. Haha. But today, i really feel so fear, i could be using something that i never try before, is good to try something new. My fear is cause by i feeling not confident, i even try to express to trainey, just telling that this really hard, something to let go from my heart.

again. Being able making decision that need to consider every1 is hard. Very very hard. My mind is every1 should not be left alone. Hope tomoro a good day. Oh ya. I really love teaching, so happy able to give

Guess what. Yesterday night, after i post my blog, i really can't wait till wednesday. I went out and watch the movie, and alone, i can't recommend it, being alone at late night is a bit dangerous, but i did all the time and don't realise it, perhaps this time i'm fully awake.

ok. Robin hood? Well. It really impressive. The director able to capture the era how the robin hood became a thief. How a king ego can change the history. 1 thing i confuse, how they come from france to england, isn't that far away. Ok. This really a guys movie. I give 4 out of 5

Hey. Right now. My desire, my will, that i want watch robin hood. Recently, i'm giving up wan to watch it, suria gsc just open and penampang megalong cineplex also open, but none showing robin hood.

i watch history channel and they talk about robin hood. My heart tell, you gotta watch this. Switch channel and watch this movie on this wednesday.

Lily allen - who'd have know and a friend frenzy - happier

somehow i like this song.

Yesterday and this sunday morning, i wake up. Feel really empty inside me. There is no tear. No emotion. Just stagnant. I don't know what get into me. But i know, i wan talk to somebody. I just need some smile today. Yet i can't get one. I guess i need go out, get some air, get out alone wasn't my plan for weekend, usually i stay alone in my house. Watching tv to kill the time.

i guess i better go out my hair and wash it. Hehe.

I really forget to write this blog. The thing is, inside me is really down, really sad, if i express it, everyday i will be say the same thing.

i do accept thing happened, but i just cant believe it. I always looking for change, but is all a cover up, even i achieve it, why my heart still feel the same.

why i feel that i'm the 1 that u talking about...