Silent mean something wrong. I can't tell about it here cos is too personal to some1. is killing me slowly inside. Make me feel hopeless, lifeless and meaningless.

grey anatomy

We spend alot our time focus on our future, many working toward it. But at some point, we start to realise that life is happening now. Not after graduation, not after get promotion, right now! This is it, its here, blink and we will miss it.

but,did you say it? I love you. I don't want to live without you. You change my life. Did you say it. Make a plan, set a goal, work toward it, but every now and then, look around, dream it in, cos this is it, it might all be gone tomoro.

hey. Mine is gone. I'm stupid. I look in future too much. And i'm regret it. All my life.

grey anatomy

You never knew the biggest day of your life is going to be biggest. Today you think that are going be big one, is never big as they made to be in your head. Is the regular day, the one with start up normal, those are the day end up being the biggest and today wit thing happen around you, is beautifull, is prefect.

you never knew the biggest day in your life is the biggest day, not that happening before. You never reconnelize the biggest of you life, not until you rated in the middle of it, the day you committed to something, someone, the day that you get heard broken, the day you meet your soulmate, the day you realise there not enough time because you want to live forever, those are the biggest day, perfect day.

what your biggest day? I got mine. Of cos i got. Hehe.

Why does heart feel heavy? Why chest area feel like very stress? I also had this feeling. Perhaps i got stress problem. May be in future i can easy get heart attack. And usually this moment, i really desperate to talk. Seek attention. Something like that make me feel revive.

i somehow know the answer for this. I just need set myself to achieve something. Anything that i can success. But what i can do. My mind always find love. Right now. I really i can call some1. Try to talk. And this will make me excited for whole day, unless it turn out bad. That only quick fix.

the other is. Well cooking. But this somehow limited. I can only cook for my meal and prevent wastefull. I can only cook in small quantity. Most of the time i fail, but at least i try and i'm happy for it. I know i will improve it next time cook. Hehe.

what else? Herm. Nothing. Read novel? Is just not the right time to read book.

i also hope for gaming. But it will be impossible.

My mind right now wan to tell lots of thing. I just can't express it out here because is too personal. Pass few days lots of thing happen, but none are excited. All seem like a punch to my mind, the true is always hurt when discovered.

do my mind create this world as positive as it possibility. Does i believe that is just a NO? Or is just my timing now bad. I don't know. At least i ask, at least i try to have courage, i know i'm somehow a loser. But i know this wont stop me.

one thing bother me is, yesterday my life could be ended. A lorry almost ran over me. But i'm sure my mind is not around that time. I remember i was crossing the road, my mind were at somewhere, thinking about i forget the camera. So. I cross the road. I look on the wrong side of the road. Then. The lorry break. I step back. The go at the back of lorry. The lorry driver seem have a heart attack. I know is foolish me. I really will encounter accident if i'm not carefull enough. I guess is not my day. Thanks Lord.

I'm sad now.. Tears running down.. Listening to 'take a bow'. I search this song sang by rihanna, i can't find it. But lucky i found the song sang by glee. I keep replay this song. The voice is beautifully. I can't stop listen to it. I just keep repeat. I know is stupid. But i can't stop hear the voice. There word that i focus more, like sorry, is over now, faithfull, lie, time to go. i don't know the song mean. But my heart just feel sad when hear this. Stupid right. I'm sad and alone. Isn't my blog about.

I need laptop

Seriously... i wan laptop... i getting tired updated my post using my phone... so much limitation... all text.... i start to envy those post got picture... i can do better for myself.. but i need decent platform... is the latest handphone can replace blog posting for laptop..

i got pc in office.. but no word come out in my mind for posting...

back to work

Is been 2 days after the trainee is gone. Yes. They had finish their training and now start back studying in ums. Well. 10 weeks seem days. Haha. I miss those guys. Huhu. How will get 1 soon again. Hehe.

Hey. Monday is always the talk i talk the most alone to myself. Why? Monday night laugh. There lots of comedy show, and i say they cheer me up, totally.

well. There one thing. How i meet your mum show. Friendship is a unique thing. I really hope there something like that happen in my life. I'm sad inside. Talk to this blog wit no respond. I know lots of thing bad going to happen soon. I can only wait it happen and hold on tight. I'm the person love to be around people, but i'm untalkative. Haha. Finding true friend is im possible. Even more wit lover

movie - angel and demon

Yes. Another movie review for this week. I watch lots of movie. Ok. This is a bit outdated movie, but it premier on HBO HD, well, HD is better in picture than in cinema, but sound, herm, i need another setup. Ok.

i guess every1 is familiar wit this movie, so i wont talk about it. When to think of it, this movie is mediocore, is not that great, the story based on best seller novel, of cos is interesting, the camera is were nice. And the set, is detail. This could be personal preferrence. The old movie and i ever watch it. It miss the wow effect. Could be just that.

there also make me feel like wan to go to rome and discover all of this, the vatican, the temple, all around rome. I also wan to put my trade mark on my design. How i wish that happen. Haha.

ok. No score for this movie. I think i ever review it.

movie - a single man

Ok. This is a sick movie. Is a gay movie. But this movie is 5 star, it really good. The story, the actor, the music the camera, is all perfect. It just a gay movie, got butt showing part, kissing, damn.

i say this movie is good. I do not support anything. Movie review fan should watch this. I'm speechless. 5 out of 5. I wan make 4 cos of gay but but i'm sincerely think this movie is good.

movie - the bounty hunter

This movie is ok. I don't know wat movie is this. Here just to sum it of. 2 divorced people. He want to catch his ex wife because she bail out from jail. She got into trouble from a case where this bad guy wan to kill her. He got huge debt and the bookie want to get the money back. Is a bit of twisted, i know. Nice to watch because jennifer aniston where in th movie. She still look hot. That only i care of.

totally 2 of 5. I would give 3 but she a bit old already.

movie - chleo

Herm. 3 out of 5 movie. This movie can be good or bad, depend on who watch this. Is a rare type of movie for me. An exotic triller. The actor are top class, well, the bad girl is well hot. Is really a good movie after i think about it now. Ok. Here the story

this mum believe her husband cheating at her, so she hired a escort girl to make sure her husband aren't playing around. But here the thriller part, this escort girl love this mum, then she lie to her. Is a bit strange. Well. The actor play well.

still 3 out of 5.

grey anatomy

When something being, we generally had not idea how it going to end, the house that we think a slump will became home sweet home, the roommate that we force to take it became our family, and the most hate person that we meet became our love.

we got lots of begining or starting point, i start my study to became engineer, i meet my love true when secondary school, i start working, i move away from family, i stay at kk.there lots of begining, lots of starting point in my life, each decision i made, is just a being. I write this blog, i sad and lonely, this just being, perhaps one day, it will change. there are many thing that ever happen in me, all bad things and good things,and will happen the same in future.

we spend our whole life worry about our future, planning our future, trying to predict our future, as if figuring it will somehow cushion the blow, but the future is always changing. The future is the home of our deepest fear, and our widest hope. But 1 thing for certain, when it finally reviled itself, the future is never ever we imagined.

Hello there. My weekend totally in the house. I didn't get out, i didn't even bother look outside. I just feel like sitting in front of tv, watch supernatural, the whole season 5. Wow.

i know is unproductive. Is wastefull. Is lazy. But just i feel i wan stay home. My planning is want to try new restrouran, i got 1 italian and 1 mediterian restrouran to try. And watch movie. Got new 3D and knight and day. I feel like want to watch them but no date. Could be i run out budget.

i could be feeling sad. Feeling lonely. But really. I just wan to rest. Tomoro is monday. After 5 days, will be another weekend. Life is a bit bored now. Need to find some1 same interest.