Thursday, October 29, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Monday, October 19, 2009
he is desmond, my classmate that use to sit beside me. How can i forget. Huh. I feel so guilty. Oh well, i just i need to find out his contact soon.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
last friday is my b'day, nope, i don't celebrate it. Just spend on big apple donut to my office staff. That all. Well. Some1 forget my b'day. Wat can i say, angry or sad. Just glad my special day passes.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Monday, October 5, 2009
i sometimes asking do i have my own personality, my own look, my own principal. The moment my life change, i didn't care so much about it. I just live the life as it is, as it flow, i just follow it. But recent event, make me think twice. Sometimes, i just not me. I don't know how to explain it. I need to learn as fast as possible about how to survive, how to connect. Well. I guess i'm failing.
i'm really week. Throughout my life, i got people that help get up. But as time move on, nothing stay. Perhaps, this is i'm looking for. Help. I know there were some1 that willing to help me if i'm ask. But that just temporary.
i really hate if i got the feeling that is not alright. Things will go wrong soon enough if i'm don't take action. Come on syl, have courage.
this blog is my only way it express my feeling. There nobody that i can talk to. Only to myself. Ok. Good night guys
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Saturday, October 3, 2009
if there is a noise, it's internal. It screams and no one can hear it but yourself. It scream so loud your ears ring and your head aches. It thrashes around in your chest; it roars. But thats the thing about love - no one is untouchable. It's as wild as that, as raw as an open flesh wound exposed to salty sea water, but when it actually breaks, it's silent. You're just screaming on the inside and no one can hear it.
Friday, October 2, 2009
this pass few months had teach me alot. Still my emotional still the same. Firstly. Cayra called me last time, and tell she don't want more connection between us. At that point, i feel kinda relief, relief that she actually tell she got bf. Well. Is about time for me to get 1 too. But same time, i feel there is something pierce my heart, i still love her. Is hard to avoid that but i have to hang up phone quickly. Looking at myself feeling the pain, i can't think of anything else. Well. The only thing is find another love. Hehe.
there another thing bothering is i'm glad people break up. I'm always feel that i'm not alone in this sadness. And i actually tell them life really sucks right. Hehe. And. I also hate those people that find new love. Jealous is the right word. Hehe.
There 1 blog that i feel so touching. She wrote about how sorry is she, how she can change back the way is it. I really wish those word are for me, not for her special 1. I really wish i get those word, in my ending, i feel the worst, worst ending for a long beautifull story. I want tell who is this person/blog i mean. But i just can't. Perhaps she will leave a comment. :p
what inside my mind again, herm. The book i read. But pretty sure i will give it a review. Not now. But 1 thing for sure, each time i read about love, my heart always cry. I feel i need it the most. Each time see movie, heard music, and read anything about love, i just wish i can have it. I understand each word of it. I can feel the joy, happiness, the suffering, sad. I don't know how to not feel emotion. Is just hard.
there 1 thing also inside me that i had walk into a dark path. I really wish i can say no. But i had no choice. But now, i try looking on other way, i tried to contact any1 that in kk, have courage to just ask them out. Hehe.
that all i wanted to say. Glad it out of me. Although is not much of detail. Can't review too much cos is very personal. Bye